SO JUST WHY AREN'T

they the Boston Keltics? I know it's not spelled that way, or is it spelt that way? If smelt is smelt, and by the way it isn't, then why can't spelt be spelt? Well, if you've had enough already, you may just want to return tomorrow to On the QT, because that what this entry is all about.

Another thing (one of my two followers has suggested that I take Andy Rooney's place when/if he retires, but I think I may have more in common, at least in writing style and subjects with author Bill Bryson as another faithful reader pointed out before I knew who he was. Byson that is: I've known the faithful reader since first grade) {what a long parenthetical expression, or more accurately use of parentheses} that annoys me is the the word toothpaste. Why do we not call it teethpaste? Who has but one tooth to put the paste on? "Today, I think I'll choose my favorite tooth, the left top bicuspid to apply the paste to." It's ludicrous (notice no capital to confuse you with the rap star) to call it toothpaste. Talk about a misnomer.

Did you ever notice that only skinny people drink coffee at Starbucks between the hours of 5:00 and 7:00 PM? It's true. Check it out at any Starbucks. With one caveat-- they cannot be eating a Starbucks sandwich with their coffee or all bets are off. If they have only a tall, then 100% of the time, they will be lean. I know, that had nothing to do with etymology or other linguistic terms I had to study for a year to get an English degree. That is a BA in English. Although I received a BS in English because I had a lot of science courses and education courses, I think. Anyway a BS in English seems more appropriate for me anyhow.

I have a drawing hanging in an extra bathroom/spare bathroom/necessary room when I'm returning full bladdered from a three mile walk that says "When I told him I had a major in English, he said 'Too bad for you for this is America', and he started me at the bottom." And I can think of no better way to end this missive.