WHAT A GOOD BOY AM I

I just accompanied my wife flower shopping. It's that time of year when frost has taken some of our flowers and it's time to re-load. My input is sometimes taken into consideration and other times rejected because well, I don't know much about flora and fauna, though no fauna were purchased today.

Of course, while pushing the oversized cart, thoughts of a different nature crossed my mind. Such as, are there any masculine named flowers? I mean no man wants to be called a pansy. And why is a pansy more feminine that myrtle. It sounds just as effective. You know, "C'mon. Don't be a myrtle."

Now a Venus flytrap might just be the mano of all flowers. I mean, it eats protein. It looks tough. But I'm hard pressed to think of another masculine X chromosome flower. Saying a dandelion is masculine ignores the prefix. There is simply no lion who would want to called dandy. Even herbs aren't pronounced herbs with an H.

The lilies, the hydrangea, the poesys, the black eyed Susans. See what I mean. But I endured. I looked at geraniums, columbines, as well as some succulents, some ferns--I mean the men don't have a chance. Irises, the list goes on and on.

We came home with some miniature petunias. There you have it: not even a full blown petunia. It still sounds effeminate.

We're not finished either. Two pots with irrigation drip lines are currently spewing their moisture to soil-filled pots. I survived one trip, but when comes such another? Soon. Very soon.