I'M FOREVER BLOWING...

When all of those organizations (by the way, the Canadians do have the pronunciation for that word right; that is, organIzation. We Americans have allowed sloppiness in speech to change the I to A in our pronunciation) promoting peaceful negotiations, sit down at the table (remember when the Viet Nam War dragged on and on and discussions couldn't commence until they decided what shape the table was to be?) it should be required that they be given a plastic can of bubbles.

They would be so useful there. Not only to relax, but to show disdain. When an adversary recommended something stupid (once in a teacher/board negotiation after our initial request of a 6 per cent raise, a board member responded, "that's just the number we were thinking of" and paused. He continued, "A 6% reduction in salary.") the other party could take a deep breath and blow a stream of bubbles at him. No harm/ no foul and the blower, well, blew off some steam rather than sit there stewing, elevating the old BP.

Once any kind of agreement or any part of an agreement was ratified, both sides could blow celebratory bubbles in the air. It could encourage more agreements on other issues just to put each party in a happy mood. I'd go as far as suggesting a big bubble maker for final agreement or settlement. Huge awkward looking bubbles resembling a couch or at least a love seat would waft or glug into the air as a sign that a new Pope had been elected. Nevermind--that's chimney smoke.

But hey, bubbles even made Lawrence Welk's music sound better. So there is a precedent.