SOCIAL GRACES

One thing I'd like to do in public is to lick. Literally clean my plate by licking it clean.

Especially ice cream in a bowl. What a waste not to get every last bit.

Mixing bowls, too. They could sell the chance to clean a mixing bowl. "I'll have a New York Strip bone-in medium with a salad, French dressing (I know, no one has French dressing anymore, but it's still my favorite) baked potato with butter on the side and a bowl from the tres leche dessert. Not the desert, that would be too filling, but a good old lick of the bowl with the egg beaters would suffice."

I mean it couldn't be any worse than the stupid bib they put on you in some restaurants when you're eating crab legs. It couldn't be worse than a bowl to toss your ribbones in. Or the restaurants where they serve you peanuts in the shell and encourage you to throw the empty shells on the floor. There's even a famous Missouri restaurant that bills itself as "home of the throwed rolls". Hey, it's not as bad as people who talk with food in their mouths, some waiting to load up before initiating a conversation.

Lickers of the world unite. We can make this socially acceptable. The Colonel tried it with "finger lickin'good", but he didn't go far enough. Licking the bucket wouldn't work though. Too much like kicking the bucket.

But a finishing touch to a piece of piewould be a good plate-cleaning lick. Lots of desserts would work. With one caveat-- only lick your own plate. I mean, we are civilized. Somewhat.