BUT IT'S ALL IN THE DEFINITION

"It depends on what the meaning of 'is, is'." Bill Clinton, responding to a question during his impeachment hearing.

What is the meaning of simple? Easy or naive? In a way, they're the same. Snoop and Woodstock seem to have re-discovered one. Jumping in a pile of leaves. Or just jumping. Have you tried to jump lately? It's not simple for me anymore.

I loved jumping. Far too many times, according to my parents, would I go through our house jumping to try to touch the top of doorways. When I succeeded I usually left a smudge on the paint. Sometimes either I jumped higher or outgrew the clean up, because you could see fingertip marks on top of the previous fingertip marks. I guess it was my way of jumping on the bed. Which I knew better.

I loved to time my jump and grab a rebound from a taller player. Hot dog that I was, I would unnecessarily smack the ball into my hands, punctuating the feat. But having never touched a regulation height rim, I suppose it was more of my timing and position than my vertical leap. But sometimes if you think you can do something, then you can.

I knew I was a lousy high jumper. If I couldn't land on my feet, then I couldn't make the jump. Not like my father who pole vaulted into sawdust pits. And hurdles, even the low ones were out of the question. I couldn't time those, and besides, I was so slow that the other runners could knock down a few, get up and still beat me, even I cleared all the hurdles.

But my jumping today is limited to the swimming pool, cannonball style. Oh, I'll try to leap once in awhile just for the memory. But don't try to measure my vertical anymore. If you do, you won't need anything more than a ruler, so don't bother with the tape measure.