WE HAVE OUR TAILS OR TALES FOR 2009

"And that was the year that was," a paraphrase of Walter Cronkite's sign off.

There are plenty of reviews on the newsstands, at the grocery store check out lines, on the world wide web, that you don't need an encapsulation by me.

We have our own reviews done mentally or kept in a book or ledger of some sort. In fact, I was just reviewing mine. It was a Christmas gift from our realtor last year. The important stuff I write down are meetings, golf scores and birdies, haircuts and other appointments.

Not counting on another one from our neighbor-salesman, I suggested a nice leather kinda looking one for Christmas. Of course my wife obliged, especially since she got it at the Christian Bookstore. She almost never refuses a request from there. If they only made Christian 3-woods.

But it is cool, complete with bible readings and charts and measurements and time zones; probably more stuff than I need, but it's an impressive book that I already have entries filled in. My first was that I am in charge of an emergency that may occur at the church on January 3. Now that's scary.

You see, every year we (the elder board) give the staff time off around Christmas, including our pastoral staff. So the elders have to cover. Last year I had no emergencies on my date and since my term is up in January, this is my last official duty. So I'm hoping for a smooth 1/3/10. I don't think I'm a real emergency guy.

Not that I wouldn't try. I'm just not very good at most things that might fall under that category. Just yesterday I had to change a light bulb that literally blew out above our kitchen table. First of all, I didn't even get all the glass from the bulb picked up until the fourth or fifth try. It was frosted and identical in color to our tile, so maybe I could be forgiven for that one.

Could I do it? Could I go to the garage, retrieve the ladder, reach over the table that extends and change 3 bulbs (we made executive decisions that we would lower the wattage and kind of bulbs after the blow up) including pulling out the remains of the one gone bust? Nope.

I had to get my wife, she of smaller hands, to pull out filament and what was left of the bulb including the screw-in part.

So if the church has its first emergency in 2010, I hope my wife is home.

Happy New Year! I'd say, "Have a Happy, safe, and prosperous New Year," but I'm not sure that's pc anymore.