I'M FOREVER BLOWING...

When all of those organizations (by the way, the Canadians do have the pronunciation for that word right; that is, organIzation. We Americans have allowed sloppiness in speech to change the I to A in our pronunciation) promoting peaceful negotiations, sit down at the table (remember when the Viet Nam War dragged on and on and discussions couldn't commence until they decided what shape the table was to be?) it should be required that they be given a plastic can of bubbles.

They would be so useful there. Not only to relax, but to show disdain. When an adversary recommended something stupid (once in a teacher/board negotiation after our initial request of a 6 per cent raise, a board member responded, "that's just the number we were thinking of" and paused. He continued, "A 6% reduction in salary.") the other party could take a deep breath and blow a stream of bubbles at him. No harm/ no foul and the blower, well, blew off some steam rather than sit there stewing, elevating the old BP.

Once any kind of agreement or any part of an agreement was ratified, both sides could blow celebratory bubbles in the air. It could encourage more agreements on other issues just to put each party in a happy mood. I'd go as far as suggesting a big bubble maker for final agreement or settlement. Huge awkward looking bubbles resembling a couch or at least a love seat would waft or glug into the air as a sign that a new Pope had been elected. Nevermind--that's chimney smoke.

But hey, bubbles even made Lawrence Welk's music sound better. So there is a precedent.

THE DAY AFTER

What a great day after giving thanks. Black Friday aside. Is there any other holiday that basks like the day after Thanksgiving? All those leftovers. Cold turkey is just as good as that cut from the bird bone by carving knife the day prior. And does pie ever go bad? Ok purists, just tilt the plate and the water will drain off.

After all that food, one of my favorite pastimes is a must: an afternoon nap. Even those who have never enjoyed that siesta can snooze or lose on this day after. In warm weather climes, there's nothing better than letting the sun warm your body as you sleep in a chaise or a hammock. Though hammock dosers may have to time their nap just so in order to get the sun angles perfectly.

After the nap, there are usually some sports on the tube, though most of the better ones were played yesterday. Well, except for the Lions. But most males pretty much have the house to themselves since the ladies are still shopping, so don't do any yard work because it won't be appreciated. Wait until the womenfolk are home to see how much of a trooper you are.

There is one caveat about Thanksgiving and the day after. It was given by some model or actress, heck maybe a singer named Kate Moss. It's a quote that I put on our snack door cabinet: "No food tastes as good as skinny feels." And I'll leave you with that.

I LOVE THANKSGIVING

What a great holiday! I've written a lot in the past about this great celebration about being thankful for God's provisions for us. A holiday that focuses on Him and food and family and football--in that order! How wonderful is that?

But I promised that I would reveal my answer to the question "What event in my life would I like to replay in slow motion?". I didn't even have to narrow it down, though about 10 different ones came to mind. Most family related, some sports related, even one work related. But the commonality of them all was God's presence. So on Thanksgiving 2009, it's only appropriate that I divulge my answer.

In 2006, 26 of us went on a trip to Israel. In the Jordan River I was re-baptized, or I received my second baptism. And that was the event in my life.

Nine o'clock in the morning that day. Clouds but the sun breaking through. Where we were baptized was not the spot where Jesus was baptized by his cousin John the Baptist. That locale borders Jordan and is marked with mine fields today.

Ours at the Jordan River Baptismal Site was seemingly a long way from the showers where we changed into our white gowns and walked to the rock benches where we sat while our pastor read scripture. Nine of us proceeded into the cold water.

I was dunked and emerged and looked to the heavens. I still remember the sky, the sun peeking through, the cold almost green water and the great feeling.

It was not as if my first baptism didn't count: it certainly did, and it was on my top ten list as well. But to be baptized in the Jordan River, well, I don't know if I'd ever tire of re-playing that scene.

I'm thankful. Happy Thanksgiving!

IF I WERE ONLY AN ARTIST



What a great idea I just had. Personalize a balloon with a drawing or caricature of the purchaser. Ok, I had some help with this picture, but what kind of person wouldn't be pleased to see their own picture on a balloon?
I'd select a helium balloon. That way when all the gas leaked out you could see what you'd look like in a few decades.

A friend of mine went hunting in Canada a few years ago. He hiked long and hard into the north country. He shot a moose. He dressed it out enough to haul the carcass back to the truck, a process that took several hours counting the loading into the truck. It was getting late, but he made it just in time to the meat processing center. His total charge was for 450 pounds. That night the place burned to the ground. True story.

Why is it that girls and women like to wear men's clothes? What I mean is, a certain man's clothes. I wonder what it is that makes them want our letter jackets, our coats, our shirts. Not permanently but for awhile. How can there be comfort in that? The letter jacket I understand. Like staking out territory. Even little girls like to put on their Dad's shoes and clunk. I never had the desire to wear any female clothing, not even for a short amount of time.

While student teaching in a Special Ed class, a former student and family friend of mine was told to write down everything she heard that might be necessary for a disciplinary hearing. She interrupted a dispute between a teacher and an irate student by asking for a clarification on spelling a vulagarity he had used directed at the teacher. They both started laughing as the student teacher unwittingly diffused a bad situation. I knew I taught her well.

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LOOK FOR ME IN SPORTING NEWS

A friend of mine writes for the St. Louis based magazine The Sporting News. He asked a few of us to submit questions that he might ask when he interviews different athletes. Junior Seau and Marion Barber are upcoming subjects for him.

Like Horton, I thought and thought. Like Miniver Cheevy, too, I guess. What I came up with was "What event in your life would you like to replay in slow motion?" My friend Ryan liked it and said they would use it in one of their upcoming issues.

Now I'd rather make their magazine by virtue of some athletic achievement, but that being unlikely, I'll take it by offering a question.

I thought of some other ones but for one reason or other I rejected them. Some of them were "Are you for or against world peace?" Or "Describe the first long kiss you remember." Maybe "If you had to survive on one food item why would you choose cotton candy?"

And faithful reader, I know you know by now that I have my own answer. I mean since I asked the question, surely I have an answer. I do. Till next time.

NOBODY DOESN'T LIKE M&Ms

While I know of several who don't like nuts, most in our son's family because he's taught them, I don't know anyone who doesn't like plain M&Ms. Plus, I'm glad they brought back the reds. Not that they taste better, but because that's my favorite color and I always thought they got an undeserved bad rap.

But I'm really hard pressed to think of another food item that has universal appeal. I wonder if it has anything to do with its name? At least in the '50's and '60's, M's were very big. Marilyn Monroe, Mickey Mantle, the M and M boys (Mantle and Roger Maris). Probably a coincidence, but still. Just throw out a few more letters and see if they're desirous. L&L's. X and X's. I &I's. See, none of them work.

Nor do combining letters (although S&H and A&P might want to dispute). Even P's and Q's, but they're lower case, so they don't count.

But there's something about M&Ms. I don't think their hype "melt in your mouth, not in your hands", is accurate either. But they can get away with it because no one holds them in their hands very long before they go in the mouth.

Rice krispy treats may run a close second. Homemade ones may vary in taste, but I ever had a bad one of those. I also never had anyone ask if I want an R&K treat either.

I TOOK THE HAND OFF AND IT HAPPENED

I doubted it could ever happen. But it has.

At one time, I wanted the St. Louis Football Cardinals to leave the city. I had supported and followed them for years. Even as a little guy I liked the Chicago Cardinals. After the 1987 season when owner Bidwell decided to move the franchise to Arizona, I was actually glad.

Not that I had an inkling that I would someday make that location my home. I was just tired of poor football.

I didn't realize how long it would be before pro football returned to the Gateway City. But it really didn't matter to me, because no team was better than having the Cardinals.

And where am I today when the Cardinals play the St. Louis Rams? You guessed it--a Cardinal fan once again.

Lots of things caused that change. There's lots of guilt, too, about dissing my adopted pro team the Rams. I cheer for them every other Sunday, but no more are they numero uno.

I really like the AZ team and coach. Had Kurt Warner remained a Ram, I'm sure I wouldn't have change allegiance. You see, he is my favorite athlete all-time. And that is really saying something. But his story, his courage, his ability, his faith are all so admirable to me.

He's the one I took the hand off from and changed to be, yet once again, a fan of the Football Cardinals. How long it will last, I really don't know. As a fan, I have a right to be fickle. So at kick off today, I'll be in front of the tv rooting for the Big Red, as we used to call them. But I still hope it's a really close game.