NO SOUP FOR YOU

Yep, it's Larry Thomas. You don't know him? Look closely.

The Soup Nazi from Seinfeld. And he's hawking soup ladles on e-bay. For 4-days you can bid on a customized autographed soup ladle signed by Larry.

Why that was one of my all time favorite episodes I'm not sure. Maybe he reminded me of too many people I have had the misfortune of coming in contact with. My first boss at Burger Chef, a grade school teacher, a high school teacher, several college profs, just to name a few. But they weren't funny then or now. Most bullies aren't.

But in the sitcom, the situation is what was humorous. Hey, that's what a sitcom is supposed to be about. And it worked for me in this episode.

If it worked for you, too, and you just can't live without this item for your kitchen, then get on-line and bid 'em if you got 'em. Personalized ladles begin at $20.00.

MY LAST IDOL ENTRY

For this season anyway(s). Finally, the Chicken Little of this season gets sent home. Mr. Malakor gets shown the door. Don't let it...

Happen again, Judges. A little more discernment early in the process will eliminate the possibly tragic. That a guy like that could have been The American Idol. As I said about the guy last season, the one they called Chicken Little, go to any high school Music or Drama Department and you will find more talent that those two had. But by encouraging, by enabling, the Judges almost allowed them to become something the weren't--stars.

They were both nice enough young men. But there are tons of nice young men who don't get that kind of unearned opportunity. I've known very talented professional musicians who have studied their craft, practiced months upon years and couldn't catch the break. They're still pros:they're just struggling. And to have these two find success, when they don't even have a craft, is, well, demeaning.

Sorry to sound so much like Simon. (He did have a glow about him when Sanjaya got voted off.) But I think there were lots and lots of us who breathed a sigh of relief.

But that's enough Idol for me this season. And if you sincerely liked the Chicken or the Mohawk Ponytail guy, then I apologize. But, hey, you shouldn't be up this late anyway, reading this blog.

"EVERYBODY HAS A WALL IN ARIZONA"

At least that's what one of my brother-in-laws tells me. He lives in Wisconsin. I guess there's not much to wall in there. "Before I'd put up a wall, I'd like to know what I was walling in and walling out," the poet Frost told us once. And I agree.
Walls, fences, even barbed wire works, though. Fort-like fences, even picket fences work well, too. Out of necessity, I have a golf ball net fence that stands 22 feet high to protect my body and house from the sliced drives that want to leave the fairway and rough. But I'm partial to walls. High walls like castles.
Rail fences and latticed wood fences appeal to me as well. So why do I like demarcation? Boundaries? Obstructions? Pins to mark property? I'm not sure. It may go back to my lawn mowing days as a kid. When I was earning $1.25 for a big but standard 50x150 lot. If I wasn't getting paid for it, I didn't want to mow it.
I'm not sure what the barbed wire fence pictured is keeping out. I suppose gold or some kind of buried treasure. Certainly it's not penning in even a skinny or small animal. But I thought it a cool picture with mountains in the background. And it appears to need a little mowing.

I CAN'T DECIDE

Which kind of driver annoys me most. I can't go a mile before I'm complaining about another driver. And I really try not to.

Driver Number One drives too fast, changes lanes too much, and cuts off other drivers illegally. Often times this driver won't wait for double white lines to race past you and cut you off from merging into traffic.

Driver Number Two has heavy dark tinted windows that you cannot see through. I find this driver invariably in heavy traffic. For some reason, this type also tailgates or waits until the last second to apply the brakes, and apply them hard, in typical congestion. Also, this driver seems to tool around in an oversized SUV.

Driver Number Three has, you guessed it, a cell phone up to his ear. He may also be sipping from a fast food cup, and/or smoking. He's hampered and has no more hands for turn signals. Quite possibly he may amble over into your lane for a moment, too. He or she drives all kinds of cars and if ever seen without said phone up to the ear will sport an indentation of the left side of the face. Kinda like a cradle for a telephone.

Driver Number Four is the mono-laner. At some time in his journey he will need to turn. Oh, it may be three or more miles, but he needs the far left lane so he claims it as his own. Opposite of Number One, he wouldn't get out of his lane even for an emergency vehicle with flashing lights. Oh, he'd stop, but not give up his lane. Besides, a turn in forthcoming. Soon (er or later.) Many times the mono-laner will leave four or more cars lengths in front of him just to be on the safe side.

We have them all in AZ. And you're likely to see them all everyday on your way to the store. Which may just be around the corner.

THE LUKEWARM CHURCH

That's what the artist entitled this sculpture. Neither in nor out. Expressionless. Neither freed nor enslaved. Not in pain, but certainly not relieved. The character has made an effort, minimal as it is. He's a seeker, yet he has his eyes closed. He's starting to reach out with one hand, but one hand binds him.

I've been to lukewarm churches. On a number of occasions. Everything looks fine on the surface, but the love for the Lord just wasn't there. And that's probably an oversimplification on my part. Maybe I should have said it didn't seem to be overt. At the very least, it wasn't on display.

So Mr. Church Critiquer, what warms up the lukewarm? A church should not be boring. Whether it's the sermon, Sunday School class, or music, it should be alive.

It should be forgiving and not condemning. It should value acceptance and not rejection. Desire and not duty. Value people and not place. Value truth (biblical) and not tradition. Recognize spiritual gifts and not only address them, but utilize them.

Grow the kingdom. Start out by growing the church. And retain the visitors. Engage them, but don't strangle them. But absolutely never ignore them. A church has to be about relationships and connections and feeling.

And just like lukewarm water, there's not much feeling in a lukewarm church.

SUNDAY WIPE OUT

Two tv shows I do like are The Amazing Race and The Apprentice, both Sunday night staples in our house. Sandwiched in between Planet Earth on Discovery (and if you haven't tuned in to that show, you should.) It's better than any of the science class movies you may have witnessed in junior and senior high. Besides that one my buddy Sam Hicks showed about polar bears. He must have shown that a hundred times in his career. But Planet Earth is really good.

The first reason that last night was a wipe out was no one got kicked off The Race. I feel like I wasted an hour. And it was a great hour in Hong Kong where they battled Kung Fu fighters while scaling an 11 story wall. Their pit stop was at the Hong Kong Jockey Club, site of the worst Chinese food I ever ate. But it wasn't all bad since the Beauty Queens finished second. Am I superficial or not, rooting for them? Actually, I like them better than any of the others for how they play the game.

Then comes Trump's Show, which is what I'm sure he'd prefer the name be. I like both his kids, but he has too much ego for me. And he didn't fire anybody last night. Wipe Out number two. And it wasn't even a neat task either. All I got to see were some cast offs come back, including Tim who does nothing worthwhile, including his dating of Nicole, who should have been axed many moons ago.

Oh, well. At least I didn't waste my evening watching some guy named Ethier ruin my Rotisserie head-to-head Baseball series. His eighth inning home run, did me in. Well, I did sneak a peek or two during commercials.

LOST IT

The tv show has almost everything I like in a show: suspense, action, good characters, good plot.

But they never settle anything. And that's why I only watch Lost sparingly. And even when I watch it, I doze off or become bored. Not because of a lack of action, but because a lack of purpose. Where the heck is this show going?

It simply has too many twists and new additions, but what is worse is that nothing ever gets solved or settled. And what was the deal with the hatch?

I really like the flashbacks to show what happened before their Oceanic flight. Plus, Jack and Hurley, and Sawyer are great characters. Even the strange guy presumably leading the Others is a good criminal. But I hope I get some answers at this year's finale. Otherwise I just might lose Lost myself next season.